You know that girl that says demeaning things of her boyfriend in front of his friends? That was me about seven years ago. When you’ve been together as long as we have, you learn to grow with each other, but you also grow up with each other. When we first started dating seriously, I was nothing more than a jealous and overprotective, nagging girlfriend. I can say this with all honesty because I hardly recognise that girl anymore. I’ve had to learn to let certain parts of myself go in order to embrace better parts.
My husband doesn’t have your run-of-the-mill occupation, which means that I can’t be a run-of-the-mill wife. In our household, being supportive means so many things. It means encouragement after a tough game, but it also means rooting for him when he’s playing Fifa against one of his friends. It means saying thank you a thousand times when he finally unpacks the dishwasher and saying that the cold coffee he made was delicious. It means putting my jealousy aside and helping him pack when he gets to travel the world and I have to stay at home. Being a supportive spouse isn’t a part time job. You have to be supportive in everything, no matter how big or small. I’ve had very long and very serious conversations with my husband about which way to style his beard, but I’ve also had to listen to him pour his heart out when his career took a knock because of an injury. As a wife, you can’t pick and choose the stuff you’re going to be supportive about because something that might seem insignificant to you, is probably the most important thing to him.
When we spend time with our friends and family, I’ve come into the habit of constantly talking my husband up. I praise him for his help in the house (whether it’s true or not) and for taking care of our baby like a pro. If you don’t praise your husband in public, you won’t we praising him in private either. And if you aren’t talking him up, who will? You have no idea how important words of encouragement are to a spouse. Your partner knows you better than anyone, so if he/she doesn’t believe you can do something it becomes really hard to believe you can. Want to shave your head at 10pm? Go for it hottie! Want to be the best rugby player in the world? You can do that too honey!